Friday, April 13, 2007

the universe hates me.


Finally, on the eve of Good Friday, the weather finally turned from wet and cold to sunshine and fairly warm (late teens/ early 20 C). And lo, the people of London rejoiced.

All but 1.

For that 1 man was struck down by flu. After surviving months and months of sodding wet and freezing weather, I got knobbed by the flu on Good Friday. Man, was I cross.
Going out for a few drinks and a curry on Thursday probably didn't help, especially the bit where my mate insisted he supposedly knew a shortcut from Brick Lane to London Bridge. Ha.

By midday Friday I was out cold on the couch, wrapped in a fleece sweatshirt and cursing the world. It got worse over Saturday.. Sunday showed signs of improvement, thank ****, I really was on the brink of suicide. One more day of that and I'd have been on the first bus to the nearest council estate. Felt better - good would be a massive overstatement- on Monday, and forced my aching bones out into the yard for the first bbq of the year. It was quite pathetic, really. Me sniffling and coughing, poking at a tiny heap of coals, roasting a handful of sossies. But it was the principle of it. I could go back to work knowing that I'd had a bbq over the sunniest weekend of the year so far.

I paid little or no attention to the occasional cough, blaming it on the smoke. Stupid man. Said cough has been with me since, occasionally, and quite often violently switching to a deep bark and causing me to spew forth lung oysters the size of Texas. Not pleasant at all. Some of those suckers didn't even slide down the side of the toilet bowl after I launched them.

I've been glugging cough syrup and it seems to have helped a bit. I've still got a bucket of goo bubbling around my lungs but its not as bad. All I have to do now is deal with the mysterious and rather sudden allergic reaction I've had to something in the house. Yup, everything happens in 3's. This morning, whilst making brekkie, I noticed my leg was itchy.

Looked down, and voila! red spots/ welts. Not bites, not a rash. Dozens of round thingies. Itching like nothing else. But from where???? and why?? We've not changed our detergents, not eaten anything odd. The missus is unaffected, so its not something eating me. I mean, come on. What the fuck. First flu on the hottest weekend of the year, then a chesty cough, which I haven't had since around '97 and now this! Fucksakes.

Either the universe really hates me or I'm due for some extreme good luck, and this is just a pre-emptive karmic balancing act. Yeah, that's it. I'll go with door no.2 please.
Posted by Mark :: 22:57 :: 0 Comments:

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