Thursday, August 18, 2005

Enola Gay, we need you.


I am so sick and tired of hearing about the Middle East.

Let’s face it, that lot are never going to stop arguing that the father of their father’s grandfather’s cousin’s twice removed grandfather’s favourite goatherder has a more legitimate claim to this or that patch of sand than the present owner/ occupier. And to underline their resistance to the regime d’jour they’re going to burn some tyres, beat some women and then blow up somewhere.

Take the picture above for example. On one side you have the Palestinian, bitching that the demonic Israeli has stolen their sand. On the other side is the Israeli, bitching that the demonic Palestinian has no right to his sand.
Can you spot the difference?

All the greatest intentions and best laid peace plans in the world aren’t going to amount to diddily squat on street level, because too much blood has been shed and no one involved in the conflict on that level has the courage to breakout of that small-minded mindset and drop the feud.
They’re going to stay locked in their vicious little circle of seeking vengeance for the acts of vengeance carried out against themselves until the end of time. They may say the right words and smile blandly at the cameras at the right time but come nightfall they’ll be plotting how to turn the situation to their advantage and screw the other guy over. To avenge Ali’s cousin’s mechanic, who got shot before he could earn his 72 virgins.

These days I just flip the channel when news from that neck of the woods comes up. They’re ruining prime time with their tedious squabbling.

Personally, I think we should nuke Palestine (if you can find it), Iran and Iraq.

I mean, lets face it, they serve no purpose.
Apart from oil, can you name any useful exports from any of them..?
Any major contributions to civilisation, science or humanity?

And no, terrorism doesn’t count.

Be honest- who, apart from a few relatives who themselves had already abandoned the “home country”, would really miss them?

I know it’s a terrible thought when you think about the innocent lives that would be killed. I lay the blame for the collateral damage at the feet of the so-called freedom fighters/ holy jihaddy types (whatever euphemism they’re using these days); it’s their insistence on trying to blend in with the local civilian population that makes it such a nightmare to police.
The civilians who know of these combatants, who help them hide or who have crucial info that could help the security forces tip the scale but instead clam up—they’re just as bad as the guy with his finger on the trigger, if not worse.

As soon as my secret plan to become the first modern Emperor of Britain comes to fruition they’re all in deep shit.
Posted by Mark :: 11:41 :: 1 Comments:

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